Why i never get anything done.

This is what occupies my mind on a typical day:

I sent my shoe to be repaired because the heel split from the sole. It cost 35 dollars. Two weeks later the other shoe split off. Now I have to send it back. The zipper broke on my jeans and I sent it in to be fixed. It cost 20 dollars. A week later the zipper broke on my other pair of jeans. Now I have to send that back. It exists in a pile next to my door, along with the shoes and the disposable camera full of undeveloped photos from my trip to Hawaii.

I went to have my leather bag repaired. They fixed the handle, replaced the torn fastener, and tightened the laced straps on the side seams. Now the seam is unraveling again. I have to go back and tell them, but that was months ago.

I opened two IRA accounts on Fidelity but haven’t had the time to select mutual funds yet, because that would mean I would have to make a choice of stocks or fund when I have no idea. I was about to do it, then didn’t and then the Dow hit the highest mark or whatever in 25 years.

I have to call Citibank and find out why my loans, which I have diligently paid over the past year, seems to be increasing.

Last spring I received a bill from Quest Diagnostics every week for syphilis and gonohrea tests I had taken months and months ago. The first bill was for 5 dollars or something, which I paid. Now I get bills every week for 45.56.

For some reason the monthly amount I have given to Plan USA for my sponsor child in Africa, Reagan, stopped registering. The organization notified me by mail but and I cleared it up but then it happened again. They send me letters telling me that they have to close my sponsorship and that when a sponsor gives up on a child sometimes they lose hope. I have to call them and tell them to rectify it, but just keep the letters they send in my blossoming TO DO pile.

Blackbook magazine owes me 1600-1800 dollars for three columns I have written. I’ve invoiced them three times and called twice. No answer.